She is not a BABE or a CHICK – She is a BREASTED AMERICAN She is not a SCREAMER or a MOANER – She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE She is not EASY – She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE
Posts Tagged ‘funny text’
Signs you drink too much coffee!
Posted by axavasma on May 18th, 2011
- You answer the door before people knock. – Juan Valdez named his donkey after you. – You ski uphill. – You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. – You haven’t blinked since the last lunar eclipse. – You lick your coffeepot clean.
Things Confucius didn’t say
Posted by lazaros on May 6th, 2011
1. Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion. 2. Man who runs in front of car get tired; man who runs behind car gets exhausted. 3. Man who eats many prunes gets good run for money.
Little Red Riding Hood – The true story.
Posted by DrFilippos on May 6th, 2011
It was a fine Tuesday morning in the village of Hayldet, which was odd as it was Wednesday everywhere else. Mrs. Hood had just finished her breakfast and was talking to her young daughter. “Now, I want you to go and visit Granny this morning. She’s nearly 90 and will leave all her cash to [...]
A-Z of Cinematic Nonsense.
Posted by DrFilippos on April 25th, 2011
A is for Advertising Go to the cinemas these days and you will be assaulted by the same advertisements that television executives feel the need to inflict on us. But it wasn’t always like this… Go back 15 years and you would be treated to cheaply-produced adverts for local restaurants, amusement arcades and bridal fashion [...]
How corporate are you?
Posted by DrFilippos on April 18th, 2011
1. How do you travel to work each morning? a) In a large modern car b) On a bus c) In a shuttle fitted with a cloaking device
Television
Posted by papakos on March 24th, 2011
Things you know because of TV… – If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises wearing their most revealing underwear. – If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick’s Day parade – at any time of the year. – All beds have special L-shaped [...]
Posted in Funny texts, Interesting 
Tags: funny text, funny texts, Interesting, television 
No Comments »Monkeys !
Posted by euclediz on March 15th, 2011
Once upon a time in a village, there was a man named Chris and he announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for 10 dollars each. The villagers knowing that there were a lot of them in the surrounding woods, went and caught them. Chris bought thousands for 10 dollars each, as he [...]
Two cows
Posted by axavasma on March 7th, 2011
SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour. COMMUNISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk. FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.
Meanwhile In Neverland
Posted by katface on March 7th, 2011
