An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says “Are you crazy? You just join the Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition!”
Archive for the ‘Jewish jokes’ Category
Wearing clothes backwards
Posted by viki on November 16th, 2011
An old Jewish man gets on the subway in New York and sees a priest. He notices the white collar, and decides to ask what it’s about. “Why do you wear your collar backwards?” The old Jewish man asks.
The Spaceman
Posted by viki on November 14th, 2011
A spaceman landed on the moon. To his surprise he saw ahead of him a little shop, with the name above it: “MORRIE COHEN, BESPOKE TAILORS”. Curious, he went into the shop.
Irish priest and a Rabbi
Posted by lazaros on January 17th, 2011
An Irish priest and a Rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest opened a conversation by saying “I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork… Have you actually ever tasted it? The Rabbi said, “I must tell the truth. Yes, I have, on the [...]
Jew at operation
Posted by admin on September 14th, 2010
This older Jewish man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to receive the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. “Yes Dad, what is it?”
Confession
Posted by admin on May 29th, 2010
A guy goes into confession and says to the priest, “Father, I’m 80 years old, widower, with 11 grandchildren. Last night I met two beautiful flight attendants. They took me home and I made love to both of them. Twice.” The priest says, “Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?”
Posted in Jewish jokes, Miscallaneous jokes 
Tags: confession, Miscallaneous jokes, priest 
No Comments »Hotel is restricted
Posted by admin on May 19th, 2010
In the winter of 1926, Thelma Goldstein from Chicago treated herself to her first real vacation in Florida. Being unfamiliar with the area, she wandered into a restricted hotel in North Miami. “Excuse me,” she said to the manager. “My name is Mrs. Goldstein, and I’d like a small room for two weeks.” “I’m awfully [...]
Jewish or Hispanic
Posted by admin on May 16th, 2010
Little Johnny came home from school one day slightly confused. His mother was Jewish and his father was Hispanic. So Johnny says, “Mum, am I more Jewish or more Hispanic?”
